Wednesday, February 22, 2017

Chronic Fatigue - Called "Lazy" and "It's all in your head"

Acupuncture treatment for adrenal fatigue


Hi All, I hope this post will be helpful for anyone with a friend or relative with chronic fatigue. 

Chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS)


Chronic fatigue, sometimes called chronic fatigue syndrome is a catch-all term for long term exhaustion - be it mild, moderate, or severe. In my case, the cause was adrenal fatigue, a condition which is very common.

I am making a big comeback from years of chronic fatigue by receiving acupuncture treatments.  You might not know it, but people with CFS can tell a lot about you by the way you react to us.  I've noticed that some people who are a bit out of touch with their bodies seem to have somewhat low empathy for people with CFS. 

One of the most caring actions is to steer clear of offering unsolicited advice to your friend or relative with CFS.

Offering unsolicited help can make you come off as uninformed and off-base, so be sure to listen and "empathize rather than advise."  Unless you are a holistic health professional, you may not be very well informed, and giving uninformed advice can be counterproductive.


Acupuncture


It is interesting to me that when the swimmer Michael Phelps was pictured with cupping marks on his back during the summer Olympics, one article talking about this dismissed acupuncture and cupping as mere superstition. How ironic that the author of that article seemingly knew nothing about the meridians, neurolymphatic points, and had undoubtedly little experience with acupuncture. 

In fact, after 7 years of searching holistic and western medical solutions, acupuncture is responsible for my steady and successful comeback.

I used to experience significant exhaustion that interfered with my life and have been called "lazy", "overly sensitive", and told that "it was all in my head" by folks who knew me.

Adrenal fatigue


Being told to "just drink more coffee" is not necessarily helpful, as too much coffee can make things medically worse.  Especially if the cause is adrenal fatigue, which means the adrenals don't produce enough cortisol because they are exhausted. 

Luckily, western medicine doctors are beginning to address adrenal fatigue, a milder, but exhausting type of adrenal insufficiency.  Many western medicine doctors refuse to acknowledge that adrenal fatigue exists, and only acknowledge the more extreme case of adrenal insufficiency, such as Addison's disease.

Also, please don't "forget" when a loved one tells you they are chronically exhausted because this is a big deal to them. One misguided remark I heard from someone very close to me - "you should really ride your bicycle more."

If you are not familiar with CFS, there is no way someone with moderate to severe CFS is looking forward to a vigorous bike ride.

Also there can be constant pain.  Many CFS people report it feels like they have been hit by a bus - we are talking about somewhat disruptive pain. (CFS can be a precursor to fibromyalgia). I've found the "forgetters" can be people who might push themselves a lot and may not listen closely to their bodies.

A great kindness you can offer is please don't blame or pressure your CFS family member to do more around the house, or to try to push them into more activity.  From what my prior specialist says, it is not uncommon for spouses to accuse their CFS partner of being lazy and "get on their case."

I say all this, not to be critical, but to really paint a picture so you can understand what your friends or loved one may possibly be experiencing.

Your CFS friend or relative may even be trying to hide a difficult situation to look like they are in control or be productive at work, and may be financially challenged due to having to work only part time.

Downshifting


On the bright side, I received a gift from having to downshift my pace due to fatigue.

  • The great gift in slowing my pace was waking up to the connectedness of life.
  • Instead of overly-socializing, I kept a few close, very valuable friends.
  • Instead of power-exercise, I took slow, relaxed walks, and spent time journaling and doing introspective work. 
  • As I downshifted, I observed others frantically try to "keep up" and decided I didn't have to be one of them.
  • I am so grateful that I slowed down and became more observant of myself and others.
  • Plus, I gained a lot of compassion for those who are dealing with long term health challenges.

If you have a friend or relative with chronic fatigue, you will score a lot of points by showing compassion, listening, and being understanding - also not forgetting.  Unless you have been through a similar experience and want to share resources, it is best not offer unsolicited advice that may be off-base - this may eventually tend to drive your friend away rather than help.


A Votre Sante (Here's To Your Health), Alix


Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Chronic fatigue - for friends and family


Hi all,
 
I don’t usually talk about chronic fatigue much to others in real life.  I think I can be more honest about it now because I've made a big comeback, as acupuncture is working for me.

I hope this post will be helpful for friends and family who want to support and understand a loved one with CFS. 

This is a picture of what my fatigue was like at its worst, a couple of years ago, and some strange benefits to downshifting and living a slower paced life.

People often called me “too quiet.” Actually I was too drained to do much talking, but I did became an astute observer and good listener. I’ve been called “lazy” by people who were not very well informed about chronic fatigue.

I imagine the pace of my life was similar to the rhythms of pre-industrial times.  Before the advent of electricity, the average person slept 10 hours a night.  However, sleeping 10-12 hours was not a "stress-free" life for me as there was constant stress about how I was going to get up early when needed. 

Especially since there was pain. CFS for me was more than just feeling incredibly drained.

I would wake up- and for just a second - curl up in a ball and cry before getting out of bed. I at all wasn't sad, but it hurt some all day, sometimes so the point of distraction.  (Many CFS people experience this.)

My memory could become pretty foggy, and this is not a fun experience.  I managed work very effectively and,  though using Post Its, I never missed a beat.

It's really important to impress upon people unfamiliar with CFS that sleeping a lot is not optional - it's necessary, and it's a bummer.  It is totally impossible to force yourself to lead a "normal" life, and sometimes this is hard for others to understand.

My energy level affected my ability to perform music in public and for a couple of years I only worked part time due to incredibly low energy.  There is often a level of frustration about not being able to do more.

I began to study Jean Bolen's book Goddesses in Every Woman, and I gained a deep sense of worth from the quality of my femininity - having empathy and compassion for others - perhaps because I understood what it was like to have a long term disappointing loss of control. 

One chapter of Jean Bolen's book discusses Hestia, the Greek Goddess of Serenity. Hestia is a quiet, wise woman who brings a subtle, calming effect to others. 

I began to experience this calm through living a slow paced life and people said I had a nice, calming effect on them.

Now that I'm making a comeback through acupuncture, I don't want to push myself in life after years of a slower pace.

My goal is to lead a relatively private, elegant, simple life.

I recently read that "Ordinary" does not mean "Mediocre." It means “Order or Orderly.”

Therefore, an “ordinary” life is one of simplicity and having gratitude for the small and simple things in life.  

So, that is what I have learned from having had CFS. 

Maybe you have learned it too, perhaps through a health issue or another type of challenge.
 
A Votre Sante (Here's to Your Health), Alix

 
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